ByeBye Bama: Day 8 at CASA

When we heard it storming last night, we knew we wouldn't be painting wheelchair ramps for CASA clients as planned.  So we contacted Lee and asked if there was anything we could help the garden with instead.  We didn't set any alarms this morning, we just planned on getting phone calls from Lee and Tracy at CASA. 

So we slept in for the first time til ten, and were given the quick and easy task of taking three grocery bags of produce from the CASA gardent to some clients.  It took us under an hour to take the vegetables to three different houses on the same streets.  Only one woman actually answered her door.  Her name was Ethel.  She was very thin, with a gray afro that looked untended to.  When she asked us in, we hesitated a little, but knowing that socializing with her was part of the mission, we agreed.  Though she had a whole house, she seemed to be living in one room converted from a garage to a living space.  She had a giant armchair in front of a TV and a firewood-burning stove, and there was clutter everywhere.  She told us she slept during the day, and spent her nights listening to the broken TV, cleaning her yard, and chopping firewood.  Her family didn't live nearby, and she didn't get many visitors.  It seemed we were talking in circles.  Her memory didn't last very long.  We told her several times where we were from, when we got here, when we were leaving, and she told us several times about growing up in Butler, Alabama and visiting Mobile next to Meridian. 

We listened and asked questions and shared about ourselves.  All thewhile I was taking in the surroudnings.  It was a pretty dismal state of affairs.  Very dusty, very dirty, and she didn't look very well taken care of.  While we were there, Meals and Wheels showed up and took a picture of us.  She was grateful for the company and kept apologizing that she wasn't able to give us money.  We assured her we didn't need any money; we were volunteers and happy to meet her. BBut she said "I know when to give people money!  And you surely deserve it.  It's wonderful what you're doing."

It's a myth what people think about retirement.  For every well-off old person out there who has a nice house and a deal in a timeshare, there are many more who can't afford their meds and grocery bill, let alone a retirement home or a yearly vacation to Hawaii.  What CASA does providing food and assistance to the aging is a wonderful thing, but it's not enough.  Our government needs to invent better policies, because obvioulsy Medicare and Social Security is not doing enough.  But I guess that's a question of poverty in general, and that's a much bigger issue to tackle.

Anyway, after that we did a quick interview with CASA about our experience.  They offered to write us all recommendation letters and said that everyone who had met us on our trip had come back to them with tons of praise about how wonderful we were.  I'm happy to have been able to satisfy their expectations.

I guess what I learned on this trip had less to do with building bridges between the young and the old.  I learned more about the economica state of the elderly and what we're up against as we age.  A limited income just at the point that expenses beging to go up is a recipe for disaster.  And often there's no one to take care of aging people, not even their family.  I don't think we're paying enough attention to this issue, which is a shame because the elderly are not a minority.  We're all aging.  All the time.  The question is, are you going to age well, and if you don't, what resources do you have?  No one thinks about this when they're young, and only CASA seems to be thinking of it now.  We need to be doing something about it now.  I know when I leave Alabama, aging will be at the front of my mind, and it will definitely affect my decisions and activism from here on out.

Ciao for now.

The Hottest Old Women You've Ever Seen: Day 7 at CASA

Today has been the only day where we've done what we expected to do in Alabama, and what we expected to do turned out to defy all expectations.  In the morning, we visited Country Cottage, an assisted living facility in Huntsville.  Apparently, they didn't expect us there, so it was very awkward finding things to do.  The Activities Coordinator showed us the game and crafts cabinet and asked if we had any crafts ideas.  Being 50% English majors and 50%PreMed, we said we had no idea.  So she asked if we could paint nails.  We said we could do that.

They split us into three different groups of two for the three different buildings.  Tasha and I ended up in building with pretty reticent and solitary residents, but I know the other two groups met a lot of cool ladies and gentlemen in the other buildings.

Our experience began with painting the nails of three women:  Joyce, Frances, and Oeeta. Joyce had shaky hands which she kept apologizing for.  She only wanted clear nail polish.  While communication was completely lucid, her memories were all very far away.  She couldn't remember why she came to Huntsville from West Virginia or where her kids were or her grandkids names.  It seemed to me, though, that Joyce was the sharpest one there.  Even Oeeta told me that Joyce was the kind of person you could confide in and expect some communication in return.  Though her memory wasn't very good, she seemed to have the greatest grasp of what was going on in this place.  She watched Frances and Oeeta with a motherly eye and told us about their habits and affectations like she had studied them well.  Joyce ended up being the only one who stayed out to talk to us much, and I got the feeling she was doing us a favor rather than us doing her service.  She seemed to sense that none of her neighbors were particularly chatty and that we couldn't leave until we had talked to some people.

Oeeta was a sweet old lady, very giving, and very particular.  She was quite excited to get her nails done, but she was disappointed by the color selection.  The Activities Director only gave us two shades of bright pink and clear, and Oeeta wanted color, but light color.  I found myself a little frustrated, too.  I couldn't believe that they would only keep two obnoxious and similar colors around when it was clear from their hands that most of the women preferred more muted, subtle tones.  Oeeta went back to her room to search for her own nail polish and brought back some candy and a photo of her family, as well as a little red, heart shaped ring.  She gave us the candy and then told us about her son who lived on a ranch and taught the Bible to troubled boys.  She kept bringing up her ring, and it was obvious that she cherished the cheap little object.  While we waited for her nails to dry she asked me to get her one of the fake flowers from a bouquet in the dining room.  I did so hesitantly, and Joyce said, "Miss Oeeta, are you sure you're supposed to take those?  That's a bouquet."  And Oeeta assured her that she could remember who, but someone had told her she could take whatever she wanted.  I took it back to her room with her, figuring a nurse would put it away later, and it was then that I realized that Oeeta was a bit of a kleptomaniac.  She showed Tasha and I all her collections of things she had found.  Rocks, candy, flowers, little toys. She hoarded them in room like treasure.  But for all the taking she did, she was also very generous.  She looked through all her drawers for things to give us.  Peppermints, chocolate kisses, Reese's, candy sticks, peanuts, fruit and nut candies, cookies.  Tasha and I kept saying, "No, you're given us enough.  These are yours!" and she just kept saying, "No, dear. I want you to have it.  That's why they're here."  I gathered she didn't get many visitors.  She showed us clothes her daughter had bought her and the menu from the restaurant they had gone to on her birthday, but it seemed she was being such a gracious hostess because she rarely had guests.  With our hands full of treats, we invited her to come sit with us in the TV room, but she said she had things to do and she'd see us later.

Frances only wanted her nails trimmed, and kept asking if her nails were alright.  She told us over and over "If there's anything I can do for you, you let me know.  I'd love to do something for you."  After that she just wandered around the building asking about breakfast and picking up the same snack from the snack basket and showing it to us.  Sugar-free chocolate cookies.  Joyce said, "Frances is what you would call a character.  She just walks around all day." 

After that, Joyce just sat with us and watched TV with us.  The TV was boring, and honestly, so was conversation.  Joyce told us she had grown up in West Virginia, daughter of a coal miner and a teacher, but she couldn't remember anything at all about her life. We tried to share stories with her, but like I said, it seemed she was just trying to be nice to us.  A few times Oeeta wandered in with more treats she had found for us.  At the end of the morning, Tasha and I put many of them back without her noticing.

Meanwhile, Kassy and Lisa met Jean and Dot and sat on the front porch men-hunting. From what I gather, Jean said some pretty hilarious and raunchy things.  Caroline and Meghan met some war vets and soldier's wives, and Meghan was labeled a Yankee for being from "the North." 

I'll admit a little disappointment with the Country Cottage visit.  It would have been nice to have met more residents and shared our time amongst the buildings.  As our only morning among the age group we're supposed to be helping, it was really shame to not get much chance to interact.  I wish we could have spent more time at Country Cottage to get more experience with the elderly instead of banking on one morning to fulfill all our expectations.

It was a learning experience certainly.  I was struck by how much more difficult it was to talk to the old women than it was to talk to the mentally disabled at 8th Street.  I thought a mental disability would make communication impossible, but it turned out memory loss was much more difficult to deal with.  With Joyce, it was so hard to have a two-way conversation when she couldn't remember anything about who she was.  It wasn't that I got impatient about hearing the same information over and over again, it just was difficult to make connections or find more to say.

It was also sad how much they talked about their families, and how little they got to see of them.  Many were brought to Alabama from their hometowns to be near family, but their family was too busy to stop by.  It also seemed to me that they did very little at the home.  Obviously, the pace of life is slower in a retirement home, but the women kept to their rooms and didn't have TVs or anything.  They just seemed to sleep until meals.  It really sort of annoyed me that the Activities Director was shocked to see us and had nothing planned.  It made me wonder if they ever have activities planned when volunteers are not expected to come.  Visiting Country Cottage made me really rethink assisted living facilities and if they're the right decision for my grandparents, my parents, myself, or anyone really.

In the afternoon, we went to Manna House again.  It was mostly the same as the first visit, except this time I got to work in the produce room.  It was pretty depressing to see the line of people picking up rotten food, food that I would never eat.  There was a woman there who was both volunteering and picking up food for her family.  It was her fifty-second birthday, and she had just gotten chemo that morning. She had been fighting cancer of 6 years.  The thing is, people keep confusing poverty with bad choices and poor work ethic.  Sometimes that's part of the story, but a lot of the time it isn't.  A middle-class person like myself could easily be put out of work by one serious illness or injury, and go seriously into debt with the expenses.  This is why we need programs that protect people, not money.

Later that evening we made pancakes and watched another movie.  We have it pretty good as volunteers. 

Ciao for now.

Gay Charlotte - Natalie - Day 7

Today we went to church. I know, weird.

St. John’s is a pretty traditional Baptist church and we were all slightly intimidated at the thought of attending a service, but we decided to suck it up and show the church our appreciation for allowing us to stay there. It was only about 45 minutes long and I think we were all surprised by how much we enjoyed it. We dressed up, sang some songs, and listened to the kind Reverend Foust talk about hope. It was a good time.

After church we changed out of our fancy schmancy clothes and finally headed to Bojangles. It was well worth the wait! In case the fried chicken, macaroni, and red beans and rice didn’t convince us that we were really in the South, Bojangles will give you 10 percent off of your meal on a Sunday if you bring in a church bulletin. I of course, never looking away from a bargain, took Bojangles up on that.

After we had gorged ourselves on cakes of butter, we drove to Chapel Hill to visit the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill campus. We spent the majority of our time there exploring the Chapel Hill cemetery, getting lost, and buying stuff in the bookstore. I found myself repeatedly saying, “Wow. This is SO nice.” Not nicer than KU, of course, but UNC is pretty swell.

After UNC we headed about 20 minutes north to the Duke University campus. I particularly enjoyed the gothic-style chapel and the buildings reminiscent of Hogwarts.

The Duke Chapel is breathtaking!

Interestingly enough, we kept seeing bunches of squirrels around each of the campuses. I mean, KU has a lot of squirrels. But around here they’re as abundant as…something else that’s really abundant. Rachel kept noting that she wanted to put the squirrels in a cage and feed them blocks of food and yogurt treats. That girl is entertaining.

On the way back Blake and I jammed pretty hard to music from Hercules, Grease and Enchanted. When we got back to the church we made a delicious stir-fry with peanut sauce. I knew that cooking lesson from my grandma would come in hand some day.

-Natalie Parker

Botanical Bonanza: Huntsville, AL--CASA Day 7

By 6:30am, Team CASA was up and getting ready for our day.  Since we are staying at the First United Methodist Church in Huntsville, we needed to be out of the building by 8am (the first worship time for the church on Sundays).  So, we donned our Alternative Break tank tops and were out the door--headed for Monte Sano State Park, which is located on one of the "foot hills" of the Appalachian Mountains, which surround the city of Huntsville.  It was absolutely beautiful!  We first stopped by a breathtaking view of the valley and the city from the side of the mountain before beginning our trek around a three mile loop trail.  It was the first time I had been 'officially' hiking in more than a year and it felt great to be out on a trail again.  The views were gorgeous, though most of the time we were simply walking through the forest, trying to avoid anything that looked remotely poisonous. (None of us were positive what poison Oak or Ivy looked like, so we just decided as a group to avoid contact with all vegetation altogether.) By the time 9:30am rolled around and we were finished with the trail, we were all famished and our legs were very tired.  So, since this is our one glorious day off, we headed back to the church to quietly rest and wait till lunch time.  We spent the rest of our morning napping, eating, and bonding by watching silly youtube videos on Kassy's cell phone.  Nothing says 'special moment' like watching Jenna Marbles demonstrate what she would have done if she could have gone to Cancun.  Finally, around 2pm, we headed out for the Botanical Gardens, which we had been invited to tour for free via the Gardens' CEO, who we met at the CASA Garden Party fundraiser.  Let me just say, the Botanical Gardens are So. Cool.  Spread out over something around 250 acres of land, the gardens are comprised of several different themed gardens, including flowers, water, rocks, and even a 'Hope Garden' dedicated to Cancer victims and survivors, and some really cool children's play areas.  My favorite, however, was the butterfly garden, which was not only awe-striking with the hundreds of butterflies flying around, but beautiful in its set-up and its displays. The exhibit hold a mini waterfall and a small pond where the cutest little turtles were sunning themselves, and all around the walk way the butterflies float around you and the caterpillars feast on the plant leaves.  

When we were finally finished touring the gardens, some of the ladies picked up some souvenirs from the gift shop and the very kind lady behind the counter even offered us some suggestions for good places to eat dinner (being another example of Southern hospitality, she even offered to get a reservation set up for us at one of the restaurants, but we weren't sure what we wanted yet, so we respectfully declined).  

Now, as we have yet another Starbucks/internet date, we are preparing to explore Bridge Street, which, as we have heard (and can see from the Barnes and Noble that we are relaxing in) is some what similar to the Plaza in downtown Kansas City.  I think we are all looking forward to a little taste of home and being able to unwind after a hard and rewarding week and an eventful day off.  I don't think I can stress enough just how awesome this trip has been, and how much we have been able to learn and experience.  It has been so great getting to know these people and the area, and we are looking forward to another two days of service before we have to depart!

-Tasha Cerny, CASA Summer Alternative Break, 2012

Sunday in the Bible Belt: Day 6 at CASA

So there's not much to report service-wise...today was our day off in Huntsville.  We were met with many challenges mostly due to the fact it was a Sunday in the Bible Belt. 

First, there was to be no sleeping in, since church services started at 8am and people started moving around 7am.  We got up at 6am to get ourselves to Monte Sano State Park first thing in the morning.  Monte Sano is actually the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains.  The view from the mountain was beautiful, and our 3.5 mile walk was brisk and refreshing.  It gave us a chance to cool off in the higher altitude and shade and take a break from weed pulling for a leisurely walk through one of the easier trails.

After that, we had some errands to run, and managed to keep ourselves out of the church until 11 when things started calming down...or so we thought.  We came back to the church and place was still hopping.  Everyone was there in their Sunday best.  It seems church is much more of a celebrated event down here in Alabama than in Kansas, where jeans and a T-shirt are perfectly acceptable.  We felt a little ashamed scurrying up to our room in our shorts and frat tanks and reeking of sunscreen and bug spray while they were all dressed in their lovely pastels.

We kept quiet by putting on Elf and taking a LONG mid-day nap before lunch.  Then we headed off to the Botanical Gardens.  Paula, the CEO, was so impressed by our work in the CASA garden that she invited us to hers for free.  We saw all kinds of beautiful flowers, herbs, trees, and bushes, but we skipped the vegetable garden.  We've seen enough of that this week.  There was also a butterfly house with frogs, turtles, and snakes, too.  Flat Jay loved being able to encounter his natural habitat today, both in the Monte Sano woods, and among his bird friends at the Botanical Gardens.

Now we're at BridgeStreet, a new outdoor shopping center similar to the Legends or the Plaza in Kansas City.  We've got tons of time, so we're just going to stroll around and find some place to eat.  There will be people in the church as late as 9pm, so we're trying to stay out of their way, but I see another game of Sardines or another movie night in our future.

All in all it's been a nice day relaxing in Huntsville.  Back to work tomorrow.

Ciao for now.

Gay Charlotte - Drew - Day 6

Around 10AM this morning, we headed over to the LGBT Center to work with Campus Pride on their new website. The current website uses static HTML (I’m going to pretend like I know what that means…), so they are in the process of changing over to a site that will be much more open to collaboration. We were able to convert more than 50 pages of the site into posts for the new site in less than an hour. We also met Shane, one of the main advocates for Campus Pride, who graduated from Emporia State University. He knows Reuben Perez really well, so the group had an instant connection with him and the organization.

After finishing that project, a few of us had a long discussion about the implications of federalism and the Supreme Court on marriage equality. We concluded that there are basically two ways that the Supreme Court could invalidate the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). The first is through the 10^th Amendment, reserving rights not explicitly enumerated in the Constitution to the states. The second would be through the 14^th Amendment, using the Equal Protection Clause. However, only a decision through the latter convention would overturn state constitutional amendments like North Carolina’s Amendment One that just recently passed. It appears that in a matter of months, the Supreme Court is likely to hear a challenge of DOMA, so this debate is just getting started.

Back at St. John’s, we played telephone Pictionary. Long story short, one of the clues ended up like this:

Ashley's interesting interpretation of a telephone pictionary clue.

That evening we went to a concert put on by the St. John’s choir entitled “Sacred and Profane”. It featured several hymns and a few more contemporary pieces, all performed beautifully.

That night, however, we decided to live it up on the town. This largely turned out to be us walking around downtown until we stumbled upon a frozen yogurt shop J. Then, for surprisingly the first time, we met our first opposition to the LGBT movement and the work we have been doing at the Center. The social butterfly of our group, Leah Charles stood her ground despite the man’s awkward statements.

Then, we watched X-men: First Class.

The end.

-Drew Harger

Gay Charlotte - Drew - Day 5

Today was a long day of volunteering for one of the partner organizations that the LGBT Center has ties to, Crisis Assistance Ministries. John Wakefield, the Coordinator of Volunteers, explained that there are approximately 7,000 homeless people in Charlotte, but of those, 3,000 are children. CAM serves these individuals and others by offering a store full of free merchandise and financial assistance. At the store, a person is allowed to shop once every two months, and can take a varying number of items of clothing based on recent donation quotas. Additionally, Crisis is able to support many clients financially. For instance, if someone is unable to pay an important bill on time, Crisis is often able to step in and either negotiate with the company, landlord, etc., or write a check for the difference in the bill. On average, Crisis donates $10.5 million every year to directly support these individuals.

Leah and Ashley sorting donations at Crisis Assistance Ministries.

It was really fortunate that we were able to serve at Crisis when we did; one of the volunteers explained that because we are between the spring semester and full-blown “summer session”, CAM generally sees a lull in donations and volunteers. We were able to hang up a huge amount of clothes, screen and sort donations, and divide hangers by type (a feat much easier said than done).

We were there from approximately 10AM to 4:30PM. Because of our long day of largely physical service, we decided to stay the night in and relax a bit. It was decided that we watch Harry Potter 7.2, but other than that, it was a rather quiet evening.

-Drew Harger